Next Life Step

For the last 6 months to a year, I have been working hard on being content with my current situation. When I look at my future, it seems all I can see is what I can no longer do. My health keeps getting in the way of life  

At this moment, I am just trying not to cry. I’m working so hard to be content. My mom and Julia were hanging out tonight talking about Buddy Bears. It was so nice to hear my daughter’s experiences this week. One of the kids found out that Julia and my mom are grandma and granddaughter. It was so neat to hear the story. Then I realized that this kid will never know I exist. If he does, then I will probably just come across as your typical dead-beat parent...never in their kid’s life. It hurt so bad. 

I don’t mind it if nobody remembers me when I die. I’m starting to realize, that for some people, I’m not going to exist while I’m alive. 

There are people who have only known me with my disabilities...only ever seen me with my cane. My first reaction is that the person with the cane is not who I am. I’m trying hard to be content with the fact that that person with the cane IS who I am.